I love going for walks because, when I do, I think about some fo the most random things. Today, I was thinking about Bible study, and then, I thought about Genesis 2:23-24 that says, “So Adam said, ‘This is the bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man. For this reason man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh.’” It is rather a sweet idea except that no Godly man in Genesis ever left his father and mother upon marriage.
The first time we see a man leaving his father and mother to form a family was when Cain left his family after killing brother, Abel in chapter 4. It is unclear whether or not Seth, the third son of Adam and Eve, ever left his father and mother to form a family. The physical separation of son with mother and father does not appear to be a blessing, but rather a curse.
What about a social or spiritual separation. We do see that Noah’s three sons stayed close to home both before and after the flood both in a social and spiritual context thus undermining the social or spiritual interpretation. When Ham was cursed for embarrassing his father when Noah accidentally got drunk, there was a sign that the father still had dominion over his children even after death when it says “Blessed be the God of Shem, and Canaan shall be his searvant. May God enlarge Japheth, and let him dwell in teh habitation of Shem. Let Canaan be his servant as well.” (Gen. 9:26-27). This idea of the father still having dominion over their sons even after marriage was further signified when Joseph blessed the 12 tribes of Israel. It should also be noted that the name of the respective territories were named after the fathers of the 12 tribes and their collective country was named after their father Israel.
Going further into detail, there are several examples of the wife joining with the husband’s family and leaving their father and mother behind. Rebekah left her family even though her family wanted her to stay (Gen 24:55-61) to go to her betrothed, Issac. Jacob was sent away because of an issue between him and his brother, Essau. When he left, he got two wives, Rachel and Leah, but would then seek to leave his father and law’s property to return to his family and patch things up with his brother (Gen 31-33). The last person who will leave is Joseph, but again, not of his own accord as he was sold into slavery to Egypt by his brothers. His brothers were still close to his father (Gen. 42-43) and Joseph would reunite with his father. Upon this reunion, Joseph and his brothers would all receive a blessing from their father, which had both a social significance that they were still under their father’s authority and a spiritual significance that God would pass His blessing through the father even though all of them were married at the time.
What exactly, then, did Adam mean when he said that a man shall leave father and mother to be joined to his wife? It appears that in the Patriarchal society of Israel, the father and mother are the authority figures even after marriage both in a spiritual and social sense. The idea that one leaves one’s parents as a bird leaves the nest is also a fallacious interpretation, though popular in the modern world. The modern interpretation cannot square with the Biblical message.
Side Note: I believe that, in sense, both leave the complete authority of father and mother as the families now become one in that both parties are “one flesh”. This goes in line with Rebekah’s obedience to Abraham’s servant, showing that since she is betrothed, she is also under her new family’s authority. Moses will later be under the authority of his father-in-law, Jethro (Ex 3:1 and Ex 18:1-12). In a sense this leaving is about a combination under the authority of several families. This is probably why, in a social context, Israel goes from one head of the family to multiple heads of families. (Num. 1:2). This also squares with the commandment to honor one’s father and mother and puts a social, as well spiritual, significance behind not committing adultery. This would most likely mean that instead of a separating, the “leaving” is more of a bonding between multiple families to form new families, and societies, with multiple heads instead of a single patriarch. However, this is all just speculation.
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